I woke up the other night lyin' on the floor
Just because of what I said before
She said, "My name's Juliet, but Romeo you ain't"
That's another good reason not to drink
That's another good reason not to drink
When I'm sober, I'm almost a saint
If I keep goin' on like this, I'll end up like ol' Hank
That's another good reason not to drink
I can't go see my best friend, he said stay away
Just because of what I said on his wedding day
"You ought to call her Sherman, 'cause she looks just like a tank"
That's another good reason not to drink
That's another good reason not to drink
When I'm sober, I'm almost a saint
If I keep goin' on like this, I'll end up like ol' Hank
That's another good reason not to drink
I'm gonna sue the city about that police man
Last night as I left the bar, he stepped right on my hand
He, "Are you drunk or blind"; I said, "Let me think"
That's another good reason not to drink
That's another good reason not to drink
When I'm sober, I'm almost a saint
If I keep goin' on like this, I'll end up like ol' Hank
That's another good reason not to drink
That's another good reason not to drink
When I'm sober, I'm almost a saint
If I keep goin' on like this, I'll end up like ol' Hank
That's another good reason
Baby, let me in, I'm freezin'
Another good reason not to drink